Anyone who knows me knows how much I love Julien Baker’s music. To me, it’s poetry written on an audio canvas of sparse, yet powerful instrumentation. She doesn’t try to beat you over the head with complex chord progressions, modulations, and time signature changes. Instead, she masterfully utilizes a combination of space and long drawn out notes to paint a picture so vivid, it almost hurts. Why would anyone want to see that live? Who would want to put themselves through the experience of hearing a woman express her regrets and lamentations over a track? Well, quite simply, because it’s relatable and realistic.
Julien’s music almost feels like a conversation. It doesn’t sound like she’s singing at you, rather, it feels like she’s sitting across from you, figuring out how to say that she’s going through a rough time while maintaining her composure. And that right there is what draws me to her music and her art. She has never come off as someone who was trying to have music that’s relatable. I doubt she’s sitting down thinking “That’s it! Missing therapy appointments, that’s relatable”. Instead, it feels like she’s navigating a maze in her brain, and bringing you along for the journey through her ink and paper.
Seeing her live in NYC was a challenge. On one hand, I draw incredible amounts of inspiration from her and an album I’m writing was only made possible because hearing her art made it feel possible that I too could write music. On the other hand, I found her music during an incredible low point in my life and I didn’t know how I’d react to seeing her life, emotionally and mentally. I’m glad I decided to go.
“So you could either watch me drown
“Ringside”, Julien Baker
Or try to save me while I drag you down
Want to fix it but I don’t know how
It isn’t fair to make you wait around”
It was my first time at the Summer Stage in NYC and I will say it wasn’t nearly as uncomfortable as I expected. The crowd was pretty mellow and her setlist was packed with tracks from Little Oblivions. From the moment she opened up with Sprained Ankle, she held the crowds attention. It was really interesting to hear that track in a band context. Having the rest of her band with her added an unreal energy to the set. It sounded like the album, but at the same time, it didn’t. Her entire set sounded more raw, more unchained, and more visceral. I somehow felt more emotion out of her voice than on the record, and the synergy she had with her band was unreal. The harmonies with Mariah Schneider were absolutely incredible. Everyone in the band was on point and the sound guy knew exactly what he was doing.
For the sake of my heart, I’m glad I didn’t hear anything from Turn Out The Lights. I honestly don’t know if my heart could have taken hearing anything songs from that album because of how hard hitting they are. The sadist in me wishes I heard Shadowboxing, but it was probably for the best. Julien’s music is always an experience for me, and hearing it live was a dream come true. If you’re ever given the chance, I absolutely recommend seeing her live. She absolutely rocks out and her ending guitar solo was nothing short of incredible.
Memories In Wax 
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